Starting Over at 52
Antifragility and the temporary nature of things
Have you wondered what it would be like to start over?
Now imagine you had to start over in your 50’s.
It’s not something I imagined I would be doing.
None of us really ever think your plans will be destroyed when you’re in the autumn of your life. Yet life has a way of surprising us. My plans were eclipsed by my wife’s death last year.
Throughout this grieving and rebuilding period I’ve leaned heavily on the principles of antifragility. Even when Kristy was struggling through fives years of cancer treatments, she always believed that the challenges made her stronger.
Greek mythology provides a great example of antifragility through the story of the Hydra. The multi-headed serpent tormented the ancient world because it was difficult to defeat. Each time one of these heads was cut off in battle, two would grow back in its place.
Anti-fragility was a shift from just being resilient. Learning that setbacks can make you even better was a big deal for our family. It’s not just about being robust, it’s about growing out of the ashes. The eclipses come to darken the skies, but they also leave and reveal the light again.
I first read about anti-fragile principles in Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s book Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder. Here are my summarized principles from the book, which I use almost every day to help me make better choices for my family and myself:
1. Use simple rules to make decisions
2. Eliminate single points of failure
3. Actively ‘see’ opportunities
4. Show up 110% of your authentic self
5. Experiment and tinker instead of grand plans
6. Avoid risks that could wipe you out
7. Qualitative over quantitative
8. Create optionality to reduce risk
9. Avoid things that don’t work
10. Respect models that historically deliver results
Recently I painted a series of eclipses to remind myself of this transition. The shadow isn’t permanent. The sun comes out again.
The transition of the shadow across the sun suggests a phase change. Something that I’ve been undergoing as I reimagine how I live and work.
The shadow blocking the sun is also a metaphor for how the ego can block your true self. For decades I blocked my artist side with justifications that it wasn’t a responsible use of my time. I blocked that part of me because it didn’t feel like a serious endeavor. Boy, I was wrong.
Art isn’t just a hobby for me, it’s my source of energy. The advisory work I do is also a source of creative ideas for me. These are not two things to choose between, but rather two parts of my very being.
Astrologists believe an eclipse is a life-changing time to seek change and usher in evolution. I don’t know anything about astrology but I love the analogy to my own transitions.
Artwork: Eclipse, 48” x 48” acrylic on gallery quality canvas. Satin vanish. Black floating frame. Available on www.richardbanfieldart.com
